Battle Royale
by Eodaiya
Summary: Welcome to The Program, the Republic of Greater East Asia's most intresting game. Here, 42 students are left somewhere remote and told to kill each other. NarutoBattle Royale parody, not crossover.
1. Chapter 1

**Uber disclaimer- The fanfiction you are about to read contains EXTREME violence, mature themes, and language. It is not reccommended for people, uh, who don't like that stuff. There will be character death. Oh, yes. Very much of it. As a matter of fact, I'll probably have to kill off at least 40 characters. If that bugs you, please go read a little K-rated fluff fic. :'D Basically what this is is the situation from Battle Royale by Koushun Takami and I replaced (most of) his characters with the characters from Naruto by Masashi Kishimoto. I pretend no originality in neither the country name, rules, or situation from Battle Royale nor in the characters and their mannuerisms from Naruto. If you've read one or the other, I'd highly reccommend both works of fiction to readers.**

**Forgive me in slow updating. This fic in particular is a far cry from my usual type of crack fics that I usually write. Obviously, I cannot allign the events in Naruto to this as it is an AU fic. Please forget everything you've read in Naruto except the characters. :D**

**Without further delay, welcome to The Program, The Republic of Greater East Asia's most...intresting...game. **

Author's Note: The fanfiction itself will begin in the next chapter.


	2. Part One: Chapter 1

Author's Note: --sniffle sob-- I already have some great reviews! Just for a disclaimer! Sorry for the slow-ness everyone, my computer crashed! And I already had the first chapter done. But now it's gone. . Oh, well. Please excuse my flaws in this; I don't actually have a copy of Battle Royale to guide me in such things.

Oh, and for the beginning, ever character in Naruto will sort of identify with a character from Battle Royale. It makes it a lot easier. Don't expect the same ending, though!

This is probably the longest time between updates. Intros are boring! Sorry. Oh, and I don't plan of having real pairings in this fanfiction. ;

Disclaimer: One day, Eodaiya was walking through a big city. It took a long time, but she finally reached the middle of the city. There was a giant fountain there made out of pure gold (-painted metal) and it ran with the purest waters on Earth (from the sewer). Eodaiya pulled out a solid golden coin (a penny?) and tossed it into the fountain. She wished with all her might for the rights to Battle Royale and Naruto. Suddenly, a giant dark cloud appeared over the city. A demon came from the cloud. He told her that she could never own Battle Royale or make profit from it because Koushun Takashi already owned it, and likewise for Naruto with Masashi Kishimoto. All she got was the rights to this disclaimer. Disheartened, Eodaiya went to write this fanfiction.

And so, it begins! Enjoy!

The bus pulled out of the capital city, casting a long shadow onto the streets. Men and women in work clothes lingered on the sidewalks, talking and socializing. Within minutes, the gray tones of the city had melted into greens of the countryside. With every turn of the vehicle's dark gray wheels, more distance was put between the bus and Konohagakure junior high school.

Naruto Uzumaki (male student no.12) rested his head against the glass-paneled window, watching the roads roll by under the wheels. It had already been close to an hour since the bus had departed from the school he-and every other student on the bus-attended. Naruto narrowed his blue eyes without taking them off of the road. He hated not doing anything for an extended period of time, especially in a car. Indirectly, he hated long car trips. But then again, there were a lot of things Naruto Uzumaki hated.

At the top of the list was Sasuke Uchiha (male student no. 4). To say that Naruto hated Sasuke was a bit much; to say that he was always competing with him was more accurate. Whenever he was around Sasuke, Naruto had to push himself farther, run faster, and raise the bar higher, so that he couldn't lose to Sasuke. More than he had to, at least. Whereas Sasuke achieved almost perfect grades in school, Naruto only barely managed to pass every semester (he was tied in his class for the lowest grades). Sasuke had girls lined up to go out with him; not that it mattered in the least to Sasuke, or Naruto.

Two of those girls were Ino Yamanaka (Female student no. 12) and Sakura Haruno (Female student no. 18). In their own rights, the two girls got along no better than Sasuke and Naruto. They were always competing, but over Sasuke's affection for the most. Sakura and Ino had both made vows never to lose to another, and in most aspects they were fairly equally matched. Not that being equal in anyone else's eyes mattered to either of them in the least: they cared about what Sasuke thought.

Sasuke cared for them equally. In that he didn't at all.

Perhaps because they shared so many classes together, Naruto had begun to care deeply about Sakura. For whatever disdains Naruto had for karma and luck, as it would have it, Sasuke Uchiha was also in all his classes.

Naruto surveyed the rest of the students on the bus (he knew all of them pretty well, after all, they were classmates, they all went to Konohagakure Junior High and were in year three, class B). Sitting in front of him were students Kiba Inuzuka (Male student no.5) and Shino Aburame (Male student no. 14). Kiba was talking loudly to Shino about something or other and Shino, as per usual, remained silent and reserved. Across the isle from Naruto was Hinata Hyuuga (Female student no. 7). He found it neither unusual nor noticeable that Hinata was sitting alone; she could've easily been the quietest student in class B. She had short raven hair and pale eyes. Hinata was always withdrawn and soft-spoken (Naruto could've easily been the one to notice this easiest, as Hinata was always particularly silent around him). Not that she wasn't nice; she was kind in her own soft and passive way.

Naruto blinked and yawned. Since when was he this tired? He was always full of energy, even more so than the other fifteen and sixteen years old students in his class. He glances briefly at his digital watch. It read "8: 12". It was still early; they wouldn't reach their destination for another two or three hours. (Their destination, by the way, was a study trip that his class had recently planned to go on. It was supposed to be education oriented, but nobody studied on study trips.) The blond teen glanced up at the clock on the bus, which read a similar hour. He shrugged it off and returned to his thoughts.

Passage of a Half Hour

The sun had already fully set behind the rolling green hills at this time, pale silhouettes of vivid pink and orange no longer tracing around the country's mountainous landscape. Naruto blinked, exhaustion weighing heavily on him now, and turned his head to the side. Sasuke was still sitting stoically next to him, wearing his usual emotionless façade. In the row of seats across for them, Shikamaru Nara (Male student no. 19) was fast asleep, his arms folded across his chest and his head leaned on the seat in front of him. Not that this was odd: Shikamaru was a genius in his own rights, as far as strategy went. He was lazy and an underachiever, his grades lowest to Naruto in his class. But Naruto, who knew him fairly well, knew that he was much smarter than the people at the top of his class.

Like he had thought earlier, it was not that Shikamaru was asleep that struck him as odd. It was that his best friend who sat next to Shikamaru, Chouji Akimichi (Male student no. 3), was also asleep. Come to think of it…

…Everyone was asleep. Naruto stood up, getting a "Sit down, loser." out of Sasuke. He better observed his classmates. Everyone but him and Sasuke were asleep. The blond couldn't see the bus driver from where he stood, but he saw him on the way in.

He was screened off from the portion of the bus where the students sat: almost in another room. Naruto also noticed that the bus driver wore an oxygen mask for what he assumed was health problems.

The silence and oddity of it all suddenly gave Naruto a strange sense of foreboding.

Upon sitting down, Naruto softly muttered to Sasuke "Everyone's asleep. It's kinda weird."

Sasuke's well-defined eyebrow twitched, drawing Naruto's attention to a thin white scar over Sasuke's eye. The dark haired boy repeated his friend's action of standing.

Suddenly, Sasuke was leaning over Naruto. "It's hot in here." Was all he muttered, trying to force the window open. He pulled on it and even started hitting it. Eventually he was pounding on the window with his hand, which was balled into a fist.

"Shit."

"Sasuke, what are you-"

"Help me open the window, loser."

"But Sasuke, I'm-" Naruto paused to yawn. "I'm tired and you're being loud. You're gonna wake everyone up-"

Sasuke put his hand over his own mouth, blocking air with the cuff of the shirt of his school uniform. "Help me open the window! _NOW!"_

Despite Sasuke's incessant yelling and pounding on the window, despite the eerie feeling of adversary Naruto felt growing inside of him, despite of all the oddities not willing to piece themselves together in his head, Naruto fell into a dark sleep.

A/N: Ahahaha, I hate introductions. Not everyone gets one! If you don't know who someone is later on, you can look him or her up online or PM me for a fanfiction profile and an anime/manga profile of that person.

Frankly, Eodaiya sucks at intros. Expect much better writing once the action starts!


	3. Part One: Chapter 2

A/N: Another long wait…? Sorry. XD I apologize to my reviewers. All six of you.

Oh, in regards to a reviewer's question, no. There will be no pairings of any sort in this fanfiction; everyone will be in character as best as I can so they'll just all regard each other as they do in the series. Boo. If you think like I do, though, everything's got pairings in it. Wink wink. So, het, yaoi or yuri, no pairings will be in this fanfiction! Any, all! There are none! Bingo!

Top two reviewers get a special prize. What? Me? BRIBE?! Good gracious no!

Disclaimer: Eodaiya once bet her last ten-yen that she owned Battle Royale and Naruto. She's totally broke now. However, she found a nice job at a sushi stand. All she can afford to do now is eat grade B sushi and write this fanfiction.

'Thinking' 

"Speaking"

Flashback 

Naruto awoke with a headache.

He lifted his head off of the hard surface he was laying on-a desk, probably. It looked like a desk. Brushing his blond hair out of his eyes, he observed the rest of the room.

'_It looks like a classroom'_, he thought to himself, making a note he was on a bus hours before. Or what felt like hours. Naruto noticed, with a disquieting notion, that there were no clocks or windows in the small classroom, and only one door.

Seated at the several desks in the room was the rest of Naruto's class, all of whom appeared to be in a similar state of awakening. Only a few of them were still asleep.

_'That's right'_, Naruto recalled, _'when I fell asleep, everyone else was already sleeping. Everyone except Sasuke.'_

Instinctively looking for his dark-haired friend, he glanced up a few rows and over, where Sasuke would be sitting had their student numbers organized them. Not surprised, his eyes found him. Or the back of his head, rather.

Naruto couldn't see his face, but Sasuke looked uneasy. His elbows were leaning on the desk, fingers laced together. He rested his head on his hands. Sasuke's back was hunched over, and he was intensely staring at something, deep in pensive thought. Naruto didn't need to see his friend's face to tell that something was profoundly bothering him. _'If it's bad enough that Sasuke's so worried….'_ Naruto began in thought, struggling to recall another time when Sasuke had seemed so anxious.

To put it simply, Naruto and Sasuke had grown up together, in the same city orphanage just a few blocks from Konohagakure Prefecture. Naruto had always known what his own story was-why he was there. Fifteen years back, just after the blond's mother had given birth, his parents had protested against the government.

In the Republic of Greater East Asia, acting or even speaking out against the government was strictly forbidden. The government, a strict dictator ship, was always right. Which, by all means, meant that anyone who disagreed with the government was deathly wrong. Which also often lead to the hurried and violent execution of the protestors, as it had in the case of Naruto's parents.

A lot of people didn't like the government, for small reasons. Rock and roll, a style of music popular decades ago, was forbidden due to its empowering and vulgar lyrics that might influence teenagers and young adults to defy the government. Imported books and tapes were also forbidden. But there were greater reasons that people rued the dictator as well.

Ever year, a class of juniors from a randomly chosen school would be forced to compete in an every-man-for-himself battle royale. Every student got a weapon, and every student was forced to use it. Naruto had never been totally filled in on the details, but once two years ago the class from his own school had been chosen. He could recall one morning a girl in the hallway crying softly for her cousin who had been selected and would surely never come back. Naruto had once seen the winner of the game, a game they called it! Forcing people no older than sixteen to kill each other with no hope, and the dictatorship had the humour to call it a game. The winner was a girl that time, she looked perfectly nice and normal, had she not just been the only on in her class to survive a massacre. Her school uniform was tattered and covered with blood, proving that she had been taken directly from the area of the game to the television studio. She was shaking terribly on the podium, her hands trembling at her sides as she retold her story. But she maintained a posed, faux confidence that sent chills down Naruto's spine.

_'Insane_', he had decided at that young age,_ 'is the closest thing to being dead_'. And that's what she was.

Insane, dead on the inside. He could remember every detail of that day, however small of an impact it had on his life or on Sasuke's life, who was there with him at the time, perhaps even more attentive to the horrifying story of the girl on the screen.

Sasuke. He was never sure how Sasuke ended up at the orphanage, or ended up an orphan at all. But unlike Naruto, who was scorned by almost everyone for his parents' shameful actions, Sasuke was respected. His bloodline, the blond was told, was a prestigious one. Nevertheless, Sasuke never talked about his past. Not before, and certainly not now, after he had moved away in hopes for a better schooling, only to move back three years later. But Naruto never asked about Sasuke's past, or the mysterious three years that he was gone.

Or the unexplained scars that Sasuke had acquired during those three years.

Curtly shaken from his thoughts by the sound of a voice, Naruto lifted his head and directed his vision from the back of Sasuke's head to a person standing at the front of the room, someone he had not noticed before. There, standing behind a desk and in front of a chalkboard, was one of the most unbearably ugly people Naruto had ever seen.

This person looked more like a snake than anything. He had long, greasy black hair and the hauntingly white skin to contrast it. His eyes, Naruto noticed with a troubling thought, were yellow slits. But everything else he wore contrasted his snake-like appearance. He wore a brightly coloured Hawaiian shirt and khaki pants, expensive sneakers and a wristwatch. _'An expensive wristwatch_', Naruto observed, amused. In one of his snake-like hands, he held a clipboard with a large stack of papers held under the metal clasp. Moments later he repeated his statement in a voice befitting of a snake.

"I am Orochimaru, and I work for the government. Since it appears that most of you are awake now, I'll start explaining myself.

Class B of Konohagakure Prefecture High," he read off of the papers.

"Your class has been selected for this year's segment of The Program."

Somebody screamed.

A/N: Orochimaru in Hawaiian clothing and khaki?! Writing this is going to be fun!

Updates will gradually speed up as it gets more exciting. This chapter was already more fun to write.

See you next time!


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